I must confess.....

I was the second gunman on the grassy knoll.  Ok, just kidding, Ace Ventura, always funny.  Anyways, what I must confess is that last week I was not truthful with you and myself.  I was so desperate to say that I had hit 40 pounds off that I ignored the half pound that actually was still hanging on and in the way of reaching that goal.  So, Im sorry.

This week came and went so quickly again.  Football practice, registering son for High School, son to dr for sprained ankle, mother to ER due to low Blood pressure and.... oh, yes, also the 5 houses I cleaned.  I still feel guilty for not getting on and recording my good and bad.  I did actually track ONE day......I know, I know, p a t h e t i c  right.  I was also frusterated that I went up a couple pounds (still hovering around 245 most of the time).  I did manage to go walking last night and tonight.  Last night I felt like crap, like I was super full and uncomfortable.  I forced myself to go for a walk for about 40 minutes.  Tonight I managed a whole hour which I am really proud of.  It kind of helps that I live in the country and well, if I decide to walk for an hour I head off down the ditchbank for 30 minutes and then I turn around.......i then have to keep going if i want to make it home so its nice.  Here is a pic of my way back home.  My house is passed the trees in the distance.  Kinda cool.

 Tonight I left my house at 6:30pm and the temp was 112.  It didnt bother me though.  For some reason I like it.  Wait, let me clarify that.  I like it when I am walking but not when I am running around town in the car.

Today was one of those awesome days where you feel like you did everything right (for my body) and I am really happy about that.  Now, I just have to stay out of kitchen for remainder of night.  That is a little tough but I took some Nyquil and Im hoping that will force sleepytime before I get bored and head to the fridge.  yes, I have been fighting the cold for about 2 weeks now.  I guess its not a cold anymore but I have residual phlem that bugs me.  I hope it has nothing to do with me not using the spirometer enough after surgery.  Oh, I noticed that today is ONE MONTH IN BANDLAND.  Im still waiting for the magical fairies to appear but no such luck.

Oh and since this is friday I guess I should tell you my weigh in.  EXACTLY SAME AS LAST WEEK 243.5 Yes, I am being honest this time.  That half pound is there.  I was actually glad to see the scale this morning though cause like I mentioned I was up to 245 a few days ago and frusterated.

I am still a scale whore.  I am refusing therapy for this at the moment but perhaps in the future.

I want to see what it says tomorrow.  Imagine if it could actually talk to me.  It would probably say "UGH......you again" or perhaps "would you at least put some clothes on before you step on me"......lol

I talked my husband into starting a weight charting things-ma-bob with me.  This time we are not actually competing for sexual favors but just keeping track openly.  I didnt tell my husband and family what my weight was until we left the hospital.  Remember, I had already lost 30+ pounds before surgery.  I was that ashamed.  I weighed 283 at my highest!  I could never tell my husband that.
So now, the cat is out of the bag and I can be honest.  I am going to make a cute little chart and record our weight weekly.  I even got my mom to get in on the action.

Have a great weekend friends!

Hell Week!

LOL, not for me (title) but for my son.  He is gonna be a freshman and in football.  I have been going to his practice and of course working so I havent been online much.  I feel so guilty about this.  I want to keep a better record of how I am doing post op.  Today is 25 days post op.  How much have I lost?  Well, I hate this question cause if I go by their scale at hospital then and mine now, it seems different.  Ok, IF we go by hospital scale then and mine now I have lost 12 pounds since surgery. Ok, yes, I will just deal with that.

I have hit a little milestone yesterday.  I have lost 40 total so far.  That is pretty cool to think about.  I will have to post some before and after pics when I hit 50 down.

This last week I seemed to hover around 245 and it was a little frusterating but just before weigh-in I lost and hit the 40 down.  I am not eating alot (I dont think) so i feel like I should lose a little bit more but as I mentioned to Ronnie, I really need to track my food intake and see what I might/might not be doing right.  I kinda hate tracking but she mentioned that it was easy now that she is used to it.  I know it takes a few weeks of doing something for it to become a habit so I should give it some time and then decide to do or not to do...........yes, that is the question.....lol

This week was also a little bit difficult because I was trying to get over a cold and having to clean houses was not fun.  But I made it. 

Ok, I am really going to try and post more.  I need a place to vent my frusterations and also my achievements.  I dont think family is always as excited about hearing how my day went ya know.  Ok, friends, have a fab weekend and i will talk to ya all later.

Fears and all that junk

I went back to working as usual this last monday.  I cleaned 7 houses this week.  I'm beat, but mostly because I have come down with a cold.  I woke up this morning with a sore throat and sniffles and I had to tackle a 5 bedroom 4 bath house today too.  Boy was I glad when I got that done.  I ran some errands and got some Nyquil.  I will probably fall face first in about 30 minutes.  Anyways,

I have to admit that I am a bit afraid of food.  I guess I am not feeling like I have control yet.  Dont get me wrong, I have not overdone any eating (since being banded) but I still feel like that could happen.  I dont think I am eating very much now and am doing fine.  No drastic weight loss yet but maybe its cause im not eating enough.  I am lazy though about writing my food intake down..........in fact i havent at all.  I guess I should really do that.

I have to say also that I do not have any problem eating anything ive tried, I can even gulp!  Yes, I gulp! My drink that it.  I think also that there was only one time when I was eating some corn tortillas toasted a bit with butter spray that I felt like I was topping off and couldnt eat any more. 

I am still really just getting used to eating less.  I stop eating way before I want to and it is really hard but I know I need to get used to eating less.  I usually have my protein shake for breakfast which gives me most of if not all my protein that i need for the day so I am not worried about that.

I started walking a couple of nights ago.  Of course I didnt go tonight cause im not feeling good but I am really happy to be back to getting some excercise in.

I'm staring to feel like im kinda scatter brained so I better go.  I hope I made sense.

Weigh-in

I failed to post about my pound last week.  I lost another one.  I seem to be hovering around 245.......up and down.  I know I havent been on for a week, im sorry.  I actually am on my way out the door but I will have to commit to posting some more tonight.  It's been a busy week (back to regular work schedule) and so Ive been tired blah blah blah.  My ticker is updated.  One and a half more pounds and I will have reached 40.  Most of that pre-op.  Ok, I gotta run, thanks

Post op appt, deli meat and missing my tub

Yesterday was my post op appt with the surgeon.  I wasted no time in standing up pulling up my shirt, pulling off my binder and pointing to my area of concern and asking questions.  He assured me that I was healing nicely and the burning I was feeling was normal.  He explained how my fat tissue was sewn to my muscle and how my skin was indenting and puffing up was normal.  He went on to say how the next stage was like the "teenage stage" and so forth and so I asked him if he was giving me authorization to move on to the next stage (soft food).  It was funny, he didnt answer me just went on to say some more stuff and so I asked him again playfully "sooo, you're giving me authorizaton to move on the next stage?"  He finally did with a smile and I even made sure when his assistant came in to take over that he repeated to her that I was authorized.  It was funny.

After we left we stopped at a 7 Eleven so my husband could get a soda and I thought I would go see if there was anything I might be able to eat.  I have been waiting for this right?  I settled on a pkg of budding deli meat and a stick of pepper jack cheese.  I had a few bites and enjoyed it immensly with no troubles.  That night I made tilapia fish and rice (for family).  I served myself 1/2 piece of fish and some chili beans.  I ate my small serving with no trouble and felt fine.

I had a 4 hour job to do today.  It was a bit difficult at times, like when I had to repeatedly bend over to empty the dryer.  I actually had to sit a few times for a few minutes.  I even broke down and took some vicodin.  I was going to try and not take it during the day but I think on days like this I needed it.  I am not working tomorrow but I do have one more 4 hour job on Saturday.  But that is it for time off for me.  I am back to regular working schedule next week.  I wish I did have more time off but I said I was going to be tough and actually cant afford to take off more time.

My back is hurting again and this brings me to the sad realization that I cant use my jacuzzi tub yet ~sniff sniff~  Oh how I miss my tub.  I actually take more baths than showers.  My bathroom is the biggest perk in the whole house......the jacuzzi tub, tv and mini fridge.  Yeah......I love it.  If I had a recliner in there I might never come out.  Actually most of my pictures I take are in there lol.

Tomorrow is Friday.....Have a great weekend friends and stay cool

Toughen up tuesday

Made it through the job, it really did help that the vacuuming, sweeping and mopping were done by my niece.  I felt kinda weak and had to sit down a couple times but I made it through.  I had to go to Costco afterward and pick up my remaining vicodin that the pharmacy owed me and I dont know what happened but when i go there and grabbed a cart I did something.  I think it is to the port area.  It kinda hurt and later even felt like a little burn inside.  I have an ice pack on under my binding.  I will be seeing the doc in the morning so hopefully he will say its ok.

I did want to respond to the last post's comments.  Shannon, yeah I have lots of pudding in different flavors but I can only handle sweet tasting things so long.......but I have not tried putting protein powder in them so I will try that.  Amanda, hopefully tomorrow he will clear me, if not I will tough it out.  But I have to say I did something this evening that I'm not sure is cheating or not.... You all be the judge: I blended up some chili with some vegetable broth and had that......yum, yum.......I make good chili beans.  It went down fine and I havent had any problems yet.

Thanks again for leaving comments.  I'm gonna go, my back is starting to hurt.  I just got done sewing up 3 of my husbands jumpsuits (for work), one shirt and a dress strap of mine.  Busy day :)

Happy Monday......Yep!

Yesterday was a bit of a struggle for me.  It was the first day I craved food.  I know it was more out of boredom and being surrounded by people eating all day.  So, what did I do?  Well, I think I had 3 different soups, two different protein drinks and yet nothing really seemed to hit the spot.  I went on LapBandtalk.com's forums and looked around for some liquid diet suggestions and found a couple but also found some bad advice too.  At the end of the night I ate one saltine and two ritz.  I ate them very very slowly and made them disintegrate in my mouth (practically). Yes, I felt better and then I just went to bed.  One good thing about last night was that I finally had my first BM since surgery.

I am a little nervous about my week.  I have 3 jobs to do. 2 will be no big deal but the 3rd one (which is actually tomorrow) is the big one.  I asked my husbands niece to help me but she will be only able to help for like 2 hours.  Thats ok, I will have her do all the vacuuming and mopping and I will do the rest.  I cannot tell my mom that she isnt doing the whole job for me though, my mom will not like that.  I really shouldve told client that I am going to skip but I cant.  80 bucks is 80 bucks.

So this morning I got on the scale and WOW, I am down.  I am officially closer to 200 than 300 now!  woo hoo!  I didnt weigh in last friday cause i was really still swollen and had not made any progress.....and wasnt expecting much then either.  I still want to keep fridays as my weigh-in day but I just had to push save on my scale and announce it to you all. :)  So technically, from my last weigh-in I am down 4.5 pounds!  When I went into surgery I weighed 255 on their scale.  so from their view I have lost 7.5  I am going to keep my records though, I dont want to get all confused.  So as you can see from my ticker, I have lost 35.5 pounds so far!  That is pretty cool.

I've got 4 more day of liquids then I go to soft food.  I need to keep it up and not give into the little bits of cracker that I know didnt bother me.  Hey, I cant see inside my stomach, maybe it irritated it or something....Yeah, yeah thats it, the crackers DID harm my healing so I had better stay away.  lol   ok, in case i lost you I am trying to psych myself into NOT eating solids yet.

I'm gonna go now, gotta take my boy to town and finish my protein and coffee.  Have a fab week everyone.