This is not what you may think. I have mentioned before that I clean a house for a girl from my church that had the bypass a year or two ago. Well, yesterday when I was at her house she told me that she may be leaving. Leaving her marriage! She said she has not been happy for a long time, about 6 years and she has dealt with it but she is just tired and she wants to be happy. Her husband is taking it kinda hard. He was home yesterday, guess having a hard time. I told her she could have told me not to come but she didnt want to clean. Anyways, she said they have been to see the Pastor and have talked to him and some people already know about their problems. I sure didnt. I mean, I didnt get to know her until I started cleaning for her. She told me that she just wants to feel like what she looks like on the outside. I know I have heard that before but the opposite way.
Do any of you fear what can happen when you get to your ideal weight? Do you think your life will change dramatically? How do you think it will affect your personality? How have your spouses reacted?
I know myself and sometimes its scary to think about......but i dont want to get into it here.
It seems to happen a lot. I am very happy, so I don't worry about my marriage, but it makes sense that a lot of obese women hold onto a bad relationship for fear of being alone if they end things. I do think there are a subset of people who get a little full of themselves and want to relive their lost youth, which I find immature and selfish, but I think that's not the usual reason this happens.
ReplyDeleteMy life has changed pretty dramatically. I'm actually trying to find ways to spend my time now that I'm not spending it either napping or eating. Trying to figure out what to do when you're bored other than one of those two things-- not a bad side effect of weight loss and increased energy I guess :)
I think there is more of this out there then you think. People get married for a lot of reasons and then when they change big time they let go of the past. I don't agree with every reason people have but I suppose that sometimes it just happens!
ReplyDeletePersonally the sole searching reason I had WLS was for me to feel better and for use to be successful having children. We may not be able to have children either way now but my husband (no matter how irritated I am at him today) is my rock. I will love him regardless of my size. But I also married knowing it was for as long as we both lived. We are 4 years in and that may not be much but it was just the idea we both shared from the beginning! Today he might want to be away from me though! :)
I read somewhere that 50% of people who have dramatic weight loss wind up ending their relationship/marriage. Spouses can be unsupportive or jealous of the attention their significant other may be receiving, etc etc. Or maybe one or the other person settled, and now that they realize there's more opportunity out there for them they want to seize the day. It's really unfortunate, but that's life. :(
ReplyDeleteHiya again! I gave you an award! Come by my blog to get it!!
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